"LOOK MA! I GOT THE GOLDEN EGG!"

You think West Virginia fans hated us before?

Well it's going to reach a whole new level after watching Bill Stewart dismantle their football program in just three games.

Not only did Dick Rod leave the program in the hands of a crazy old kook (did you see that halftime interview with Erin Andrews??), Mounty fans can blame Rod for being stuck with Stewart for six more years.

A.D. Ed Pastilong panicked and signed Stewart to a six-year deal AFTER getting waxed by East Carolina, 24-3, because of the way Rod and Beilein left WVU high and dry.

Who knows what Pastilong will do after watching Stewart botch the end of the Colorado game with worse time management than Ron Mott.

How about a 4-year extension?

Better lock this guy up before a school like Syracuse comes along and throws big money at him!

Note: Maybe that Fiesta Bowl win had a little more to do with Mike Barwis' speech than Bill Stewart's? Just a thought.

OLD SCHOOL JAM OF THE DAY

Who can forget the Young Gunz?! Actually, everyone can. These guys were popular about as long as ketchup popsicles. What happened to Damon Dash by the way?

TRL IS DUNZO

A piece of me just died.

The pop culture phenomenon Total Request Live -- better known as TRL -- has been canceled. The last episode will air in November.

At its height, TRL ruled the world.

Yeah, the show was pretty absurd. The idea of running home from high school to catch 30 seconds of "Bye, Bye, Bye" at No. 1 for the 254th time with girls popping up in the picture-in-picture to scream "I love you Justin!!!! AHHHH!!!!!!" doesn't seem real appealing.

But deep down you know you loved it. All of it. The lame Carson Daly jokes. The outrage when Britney Spears' dressed up in that Catholic school girl outfit in "...Baby One More Time." Even Jesse Camp. (OK, maybe not).

But shit, even Eminem did. He went so far as to release this statement (seriously): "I'm going to miss 'TRL.' ... Where else will I be able to start feuds, defend my honor vigorously and act like an angry teenager on national TV? Oh wait ... The VMAs!"

Touche, Em. Touche...

ANN ARBOR NEWS: ROT IN PIECES

From time to time we get a little disconnected to what's going on back in the motherland, so forgive us if our timing is off.

But we just had to celebrate the destruction of The Ann Arbor News here on The Realests (lack of italics is intentional since we no longer consider it a real publication... not that we ever did).

I don't know what pissed me off most:

• The AA News constantly referring to us as "the student newspaper" (hey, it's fine when you're the New York Times, not the AA News).

• Having my reporting openly questioned in their paper after scooping the shit out of them (uh, figuratively...).

• The letter their MSE wrote our MSE after Jeopardy to state that the Ann Arbor News was disgusted with us and would never, ever hire anyone currently on the Daily's staff (as if we'd apply! And now that I think of it, the last one definitely pissed me off the most).

We don't need to tell you it's a bad time to be in the newspaper business. Even Jay Mariotti can figure it out.

But no one could have seen this coming: In complete panic mode to cut costs, the AA News has gone down to a 12-page paper AND gotten rid of their Associated Press subscription. Why they just didn't shut the whole paper down at that point is beyond us but all we can say is "Wow."

For those of you not familiar with papers, journalistically they're about on the same level as your local church newsletter.

This is a huge day for any former Daily writer that's dealt with an asshole from The News.

Crack open a bottle of the bubbly tonight and taste the victory.

Note to self: This must have been what it felt like when the Berlin Wall came down...

In solidarity,

The Realests

COLLEGE FB WEEKEND ROUNDUP

We've added a new feature - "College FB Weekend Roundup." that will recap last weekend's football action and look forward to what's ahead next Saturday. It will run each Monday. There will also be one for college basketball, so we'll be pretty busy here at The Realests with our Big Ten basketball preview on deck as well.


• We always knew Jimmy Clausen was evil. We just didn't know how evil. We introduce to you: Chucky Clausen. (Big, big props to T-Dizzle on this one.) Apparently Tim Jamison is telling everyone on campus Clawson laughed like this the entire game.

• Still bummed about Saturday's loss? This'll cheer you up:



• We'll beat you over the head again with our motto for this year: "It's not about wins and losses, it's about improvement." And though the turnovers were absolutely abysmal, Michigan did whatever it wanted to do on offense the entire game (apparently one of those things was give the ball to the other team) and the D held up admirably aside from Morgan Trent getting toasted in the first quarter. Street isn't accurate and makes some huge mistakes, but Michigan just needs to ride him out and let him learn from his miscues because Nick Sheridan is NOT the answer.

• It's confirmed: Sam McGuffie is hauling major, major ass already at Michigan. We're gonna come out and say it: Mike Hart, watch your back. Considering all the time Hart missed in college and the fact we're running the spread, McGuffie could definitely become Michigan's all-time leading rusher by the time he's finished.

• We could have really used a win in South Bend because we just don't see any way Michigan can beat a more talented, much-more experienced team like Wisconsin. Expect Michigan's best offensive performance yet, by far. But we have a sneaking suspicion we'll lose this one in heart-break hotel fashion. On the bright side, we're dreaming even bigger about a '69-style upset in The Shoe come November.

• My dad keeps asking me, "How are we ever going to get team speed to compete with these guys?" The answer: they won't. 2009 Heisman Trophy favorite Joe McKnight ran circles around the entire defense and the two opposing quarterbacks were microcosms of their programs. OSU: old, out of style, vanilla, predictable. USC: young, mobile, young, energetic and - oh yeah - ridiculously talented. The day of the big dropback passer is done. You think Tressel would have figured that out right about here:



Luckily, the Bucks won't suffer too long with Terrelle Pryor in tow. But Tressel is huge on recruiting Ohio and the rest of the Midwest so we can't picture Ohio State challenging other elite programs on a consistent basis. I know it's another silver lining, but Rich Rod has long been a national recruiter and has strong ties to the South from his days at Tulane and Clemson. Advantage: Michigan.

• Give Herbstreit credit for ripping Ohio State a new one last Saturday, saying "The Big Ten is a joke, and Ohio State is the poster child." Ouch. Afterward, the always-positive Tressel applauded his team's effort. That isn't going over big in Columbus right now. I know Tressel is in the Joe Gibbs school of coaching, where nothing negative is ever said in the press. But you have to show some emotion after getting blown out for the third time in two years. It will be interesting to see how the rest of the year goes for OSU. He's a master at rallying the troops but the heavenly glow has officially disappeared from him.

• We don't have time for a rant, but the way UCLA jumped into the top 25 was absurd. Anyone that watched the UT-UCLA game could tell both programs were in shambles. Now that they got destroyed 69-0, every talking head will think they're geniuses when they announce, "You know who this really tells you about? Tennessee!" Yeah, we get it.

• Let's slow that East Carolina train down just a tad, mmm-kay? People are already calling them this year's Boise State or Hawaii, as if there just HAS to be a non-BCS team to bust up the bowl games. Nobody seems to remember USF got to No. 2 in the nation last year before the wheels came flying off. With a tough conference schedule ahead, look for ECU to drop several games but still finish in the top 25.

• The race between Greg Robinson and Tyrone Willingham to be the first major college coach to be fired looks like this:


In-season college firings are extremely rare. But then again so are coaches without any sort of clue. We're got our boy G Rob by a nose still.

AMAKER CLEARED -- ARE YOU SERIOUS?

Breaking news into The Realests news room: Harvard men's basketball coach Tommy Amaker (a.k.a. "The Golden Child") has been cleared of ANY wrongdoing by the NCAA.

And once again the NCAA infractions committee is exposed as a complete joke.

If you haven't read the New York Times story, Amaker blatantly broke the rules by:

1. Delaying the hiring of his lead recruiter so he could do Amaker's dirty work without NCAA rules, like just-so-happening to play pickup games with recruits.

2. Following a recruit's father to a ShopRite in Trenton, N.J. to get in some extra quality time with pops.

The first one is a gray area that the NCAA can't really control (see: Bob Huggins).

But the second one? That, my friends, is cheating. And if Kelvin Sampson can get screwed sideways by the NCAA for improper cell phone calls, Amaker should AT LEAST get a slap on the wrist for stalking players' parents to a grocery store.

But see, that's not how the NCAA operates. It's all about how much ass you're willing to kiss and who you're connected with.

And that's where Tommy Amaker is a Made Man.

Harvard and it's alumni threw their total backing behind T.A. Coach K told the NCAA he'd vouch for Amaker if needed. And then Amaker probably laid himself at the mercy of the committee, apologizing profusely -- instead of basically telling them to screw themselves (i.e. Sampson).

Presto! It was all just coincidence!

Give us a break, Myles. Oh yeah, and take that damn robe off!

JIMMY CLAUSEN'S METRO MAKEOVER

Ugh, we can't stand Jimmy Clausen's hair!!!!!

After rocking the "Porcupine" at Oaks Christian and last year as a freshman, Jimmy blew it out over the offseason for the Shagadelic look in 2008. Apparently, his boyfriend just loves running his hand through Jimmy's hair while they're in bed.

And by boyfriend, we mean Brady Quinn.

THEN:



NOW:



NEXT?

IS MERRIL HOGE A GENIUS?

We blast a lot of people up here on our ivory tower - but we also face up to it when we're wrong.

And something just went off in our head after reading that Vince Young is actually considering retirement (WTF?!?!?).

So we're owning up to this post in which we rip Merril Hoge a new one for saying Jay Cutler was the only QB in the 2006 draft class worthy of a first round pick (it doesn't appear we will find out about Kellen Clemens until 2009 or 2010, but we like his chances with Favre as a mentor for a year or two):



Merril, we're sorry..... And, we take back all the concussion jokes too. Are you happy now?

No?!?! What else do you want from us?!?! Well forget it then - we take back the apology...

OLD SCHOOL JAM OF THE DAY

If you missed the HBO Special "Generation Kill" - well, you didn't miss much. It's basically just a bunch of dudes driving around in the desert for seven episodes. Not exactly the kind of insight into the war we expected from David Simon and Ed Burns - the guys that brought us The Wire.

But there was a silver lining, and that was this scene right here. There's something very nostalgic about hearing high schoool hits. We haven't been able to get it out of our heads for days and hopefully now neither with you. (And yes, that's Ziggy driving the Humvee.)



We also recommend listening to the original version and Girls Aloud in concert (a.k.a. Spice Girls 2.0 - and yeah, we said it) for the full effect.

STOP THE CARNAGE!

Words can't describe how ugly things are in Syracuse right now for coach Greg Robinson.

But we'll let them try.

The Orange just lost their first two games - including the home opener to Akron - dropping G Rob's overall record to 7-30 overall in his 4th season. Next up: a nationally televised game against Penn State with former 'Cuse greats like Jim Brown and Art Monk in attendance for the world premiere of the much-hyped Ernie Davis movie, The Express.

Yorp.

While G Money ranked No. 3 on our 2007 list of worst football coaches, he is head and shoulders above everyone else this season (actually, Dave Wannstedt ain't that far behind). This guy makes Paul Pasqualoni look like Tom Landry.

The real losers in all this? Kittens. The Syracuse booster that threatened to kill a kitten for each day Robinson continued to be employed has kept his word. The body count will stand at 211 by the end of the day. There's even an unsubstationated rumor going around The Hill that G Rob woke up to a cat's head in his bed Sunday morning, Godfather-style.

'Cuse athletic director Daryl Gross has repeatedly stated he won't give in to terrorists threats, which is admirable.

But we here at The Realests pose this question: At what point does Gross look in the mirror and realize Robinson is the real killer for murdering the football program?

Pictured below: The late Mister Bojangles

GREAT MOMENTS IN AMERICAN CINEMA

Just came across this second clip the other day and had to squeeze it in here first-thing Monday morning. We'll get back to sports tomorrow:



Skip right to 1:30 in the clip:



Think there was enough projectile vomit in this scene? Gee, huge shock this movie was a flop. Time for Fratboy Missionaries!

THIS CAN'T BE OUR NEXT VP

You know the scene in Back to the Future where Marty tells Doc that Ronald Reagan is the President in 1985 and Doc responds: "And who's the Vice President? Jerry Lewis?!"

That's about how we feel after watching Sarah Palin's sports anchor video from the 1980s. If Palin is our next VP, who's next? Lisa Guerrero? Erin Andrews? Stop the madness!

REAL RECOGNIZE REAL

Is there a Realathon going on that we don't know about?

Days after Chad Johnson changed his last name to Ocho Cinco, the circus in Allen Park just got more ridiculous: Knowing Rudi Johnson was about to take his job, former Lions RB Tatum Bell stole Johnson's luggage while RJ interviewed with Matt Villain.

Way to act a fool, Tatum.

Wonder if the security camera picked up Bell saying, "You take my job, I'll take your luggage - BITCH!"

Bell then returned the luggage minus some cash and Johnson's ID. Which begs the question: Was Bell's Plan B to pretend he was Rudi Johnson in order to keep his job?

Brilliant!

UTAH POST-POSTGAME REACTIONS

Everyone and their mother has already broken this game down. But there's no point in previewing Miami Ohio, so check out our extremely-delayed musings from Saturday:

- The national media is a bunch of morons for making this loss out to be catastrophic. Some people are picking Utah for a BCS Bowl! The first half was extremely depressing but Big Blue left it all out on the field in the second half. And for once, we didn't resign ourselves to the fact Michigan would find a way to blow the game. They eventually did - but that's beside the point. Optimism is back in Ann Arbor!

- We have really mastered the falling-short comeback. Maybe we change our slogan from "Victors Valient" to "Losers Valient."

- Nick Sheridan? More like Nicolette Sheridan!!! His across-the-body, into-double-coverage pass in the first half (which should have been a Pick 6, btw) was shades of a young Trent Dilfer.

- He had a couple nice runs, but Sam McGuffie is going to take a lot of monster shots in college football. If he was getting popped like that by Utah, imagine when he comes across Cameron Heyward.

- We don't really know what to make of the defense's performance. We went from the 2000 Michigan defense to the 2000 Ravens D during halftime. Was Mike Barwis just injecting steroids into every players' ass in the locker room? In all seriousness, give Scott Shafer props for his adjustments. Brian Johnson was getting killed out there. That performance really gives us hope to be in pretty much every game for the rest of the year.

- How much chocolate milk is K.C. Lopata drinking? That field goal would have been good from 60 yards!

- Marell Evans has gotta go. Mareezy was lost almost the entire game, as demonstrated on this play when he jumped a slant route and totally forgot about RB Matt Asiata.

- Is Mike Shaw the next Mike Hart? We say yes.

- Austin Panter. Oy vey. We made an exception to not accepting JUCOs for this guy? Pretty unreal we've resorted to starting a dude that was playing for Butler County CC two years ago.

- MGoBlog has it right: Brandon Graham is gone after this year. The way he tracked Johnson down and buried his ass was incredible. In one play he showed the explosiveness and power needed to make it in the NFL.

- If you live in the New York City area, never ever go to Professor Thom's. With Park Avenue Country Club shut down, Thom's is now worse than a Phi Psi party. Nobody could move the entire time and sadly our bodies can't handle standing up for an entire game anymore.

- Did anyone notice the final play was the exact same way the 2005 Ohio State game ended when Tyler Ecker got tackled 50 yards shot of a touchdown? And did anyone else picture Lloyd Carr in Hollywood fashion calling in the play from the stands, a la Angels in the Outfield?

GREAT MOMENTS IN AMERICAN CINEMA

Yeah, we're still a little bitter over our Fratboy Missionaries script getting blackballed by Hollywood three years ago. But how does crap like JTMD get made and our movie doesn't? Someone please explain that to me.

Go straight to 1:50 in the 1st clip and 0:50 in the 2nd for the money shots.

REALEST OF THE WEEK

We take back every bad thing we've ever said about Chad Johnson.

Get ready to see a lot more of the photo below: The man just officially changed his name to "Ocho Cinco" just to shove it up Roger Goodell's uptight ass. Let's just say we now have a clear favorite for Realest of the Year.

REALESTDAMUS' COLLEGE FB PREDICTIONS

Kickoff isn't even 24 hours away and we're already popcorning in our apartment.

Is it just us, or are you not even more excited for this season of Michigan football than '07? Yeah, we were national title contenders but the attitude was A) Let's hope Lloyd doesn't screw this up (he did) and B) Let's just go straight to the Ohio State game.

Now there's just this nervous energy like before starting college, having no idea what to expect. We could completely fall on our face or the spread could operate like clockwork from the beginning and we put up 50 on Utah (not likely, but you know somewhere deep down inside - in a place even Lloyd Carr couldn't turn to pessimism - you're holding out hope for this to happen).

All we know is that the Big House is going to absolutely nuts (or as nuts as the Big House gets) tomorrow at 3:30. Hype it.

To pass the time until then, take a look into the future with our college football predictions (need we remind you of our previous projections???):

ACC winner: Clemson
Big East winner: USF
Big 10 winner: Ohio St.
Big 12 winner: Missouri
SEC winner: Georgia
Pac-10 winner: USC
Heisman Winner: RB Beanie Wells
Rose Bowl: USC vs. Wisconsin
Sugar Bowl: USF vs. Florida
Fiesta Bowl: Missouri vs. Auburn
Orange Bowl: Clemson vs. Oklahoma
BCS Title Game: Ohio State vs. Georgia
National Champion: Georgia
Michigan's Record: 6-6
Sleeper: Arizona
Super Sleeper: Temple
Ov-er Ra-ted!: Texas
2009 NFL Draft No. 1 Overall Pick: QB Tim Tebow
Date Greg Robinson is fired (spare the kitties!!!!): Thanksgiving Day

2008 BIG TEN PREVIEW: OHIO ST.

Rome wasn't built in a day. And neither was the Realests' Big Ten Preview. It took us two months, but we finally conclude this year's conference breakdown with - who else? - THE Ohio State University. But first, let's take a look back:

11. Minnesota
10. Indiana
9. Iowa
8. Northwestern
7. Purdue
6. Michigan
5. Penn St.
4. Michigan St.
3. Illinois
2. Wisconsin


2007 Preview: Here
2007 Record: 11-2 (7-1)
Projected 2008 Finish: 1st
Returning Starters: 18
Head Coach: Jim Tressel
Best Player: RB Beanie Wells

Good News:

- Where do we begin with this team? How about the defense, which is absolutely LOADED with NFL talent. It wouldn't even have been fair if Vernon Gholston had returned for his senior year. James Laurinaitis came back despite being a top 15 pick in last year's draft, forcing us to hear his name roll off Brett Musberger's tongue for another year. He and CB Malcolm Jenkins should both go in the top 10 next year. And the pass rush? The Bucks lose Gholston but still have freak of nature (and son of "Ironhead") Cameron Heyward and the much-hyped Lawrence Wilson. It's a toss up between OSU and USC for best defense in the country.

- After struggling with a fumbling problem freshman year, Beanie Wells morphed into Jim Brown last year. The guy's an absolute truck at 240 pounds and still has the speed to pull away from the entire Michigan defense. A Heisman is certainly within reach if he stops pretending to limp off the field after every play.

- Jim Tressel never gets enough credit for the offensive guru he is. He always knows exactly how much he can ask out of his players and caters to the team's strengths. After employing a spread offense around Troy Smith in 2005, OSU went back to Tresselball last year due to replacing all of the unit's skill players. They still kept lighting up the scoreboard. Unfortunately Todd Boeckman's ineptitude couldn't be hidden any longer against LSU.

- The entire offensive line is on anabolic steroids. The smallest guy? Center Jim Cordle, who's just 6-4 and 300 pounds. The left side is especially massive with LG Steve Rehring (6-7, 335) And LT Alex Boone (6-8, 312) setting up shop.

- Believe all the hype around Terrell Pryor. Just like Tim Tebow's freshman year, defensive coordinators will let out a huge sigh of relief every time he exits for the starter.

- Good solid role players pretty much all around. Brian Robiskie and Brian Hartline are very quietly one of the Big 10's best WR combos. The special teams are solid, though not spectacular. LB Marcus Freeman would be the star linebacker on almost any other team and their no-name safeties (Kurt Coleman and Anderson Russell) - though they played like poop vs. LSU - would get lots more pub if they could hang onto an INT (0 last season).

Not-So-Good News:

- Did anyone see Rivals.com's list of "fatal flaws" for the best teams in the country? They list Ohio State's as wide receiver. Um, apparently no one there watched Todd Boeckman play. We don't care if he was First Team Big Ten and is getting hype as a first-day draft pick. The guy was completely exposed down the stretch. He basically scored 14 points for Michigan State, stunk up the joint with three picks vs. Illinois and got rag-dolled by the entire LSU defense by holding onto the ball longer than John Navarre (we'll never get tired of this play).

- Of course Tressel has it all under wraps, but starting CB Donald Washington and reserve safety Jamario O'Neal are suspended for the first two games. Word on the street is a failed drug test. Considering Steve Bellisari missed just one game for blowing a .22 behind the wheel, we're guessing they messed up pretty bad.

- 117th in kickoff returns? That's not Jim Tressel football!

- Defensive tackles Doug Worthington and Todd Denlinger don't do much else other than fill space.

- The BCS Title Game choke factor. After falling behind 17-10 to LSU, OSU had acid flashbacks of the '07 title game and completely packed it in. If they get to the national title game, the pressure on this team will be suffocating and after the first mistake everyone will be thinking, "Not again..."

Realety:

You've got to like Ohio State over USC at this point. They throttled Texas in Austin (2005) and Washington in Seattle ('06) - granted, the Huskies turned out to suck - and you never know which team Pete Carroll will show up with. Figuratively and literally. Half of the USC roster is hurt.

And though the Bucks have to face Wisconsin and Illinois on the road, we don't see either upset happening. Wisconsin's offense won't do jack against the Bucks and no chance Ron Zook outcoaches Jim Tressel two years in a row. Other than that, it's pretty much a cakewalk for OSU to its third straight BCS Title Game (barring a '69-style upset by Big Blue!).

So yeah, we've got the Bucks playing for the national title - again. The choke factor will be working against them, but there's no way OSU gets blown out again with this experienced of a defense. Another brain fart from Boeckman is much more likely to cost OSU the title unless Tressel sacks up and starts splitting playing time with Pryor 50-50.

2008 BIG TEN PREVIEW: WISCONSIN

We're still shell-shocked from the Willie Williams ruling, but we're pushing through to finish our Big Ten Preview. Willie would have wanted it that way. Up next, the slow-but-steady Wisconsin Badgers:

2007 Preview: Here
2007 Record: 9-4 (5-3)
Projected 2008 Finish: 2nd
Returning Starters: 17
Head Coach: Brett Bielema
Best Player: TE Travis Beckum

Good News:

- After getting waxed in Columbus and Happy Valley last year (combined score: 76-24), the Badgers get Ohio St. and Penn St. at Camp Randall, where the Badgers are 24-1 since 2004. Michigan fans, this is the best chance for the Buckeyes to lose in conference in '08.

- Though QB is a question mark, Allen Evridge can't ask for a better situation: A massive O-line returning four starters, a ridiculous stable of running backs (P.J. Hill, Zach Brown, John Clay) and one of the best tight ends in the country, Travis Beckum.

- How does Wisconsin keep churning out these backs? P.J. Hill is in the Ron Dayne-mold at 230 pounds and good luck bringing those stumpy legs down: the dude squats 615 pounds, even more than the Great Dayne.

- The front seven returns six starters and is rock solid. They don't have any future stars over here, just a bunch of guys like DE Matt Shaughnessy that get the job done right.

- We like Brett Bielema. After winning 13 games in 2006, Bielema wasn't afraid to bust some heads after slipping a little in '07. He fired his defensive coordinator Mike Hankwitz, completely shifting the blame onto his assistant when he's supposed to be the defensive guru. Yeah, that scores major points with us.

- The players no longer need to hide their Xboxes on the road now that Jack Ikegwuonu bolted early for the NFL!

Not-So-Good News:

- What the hell was Barry Alvarez thinking scheduling Fresno St. on the road, especially after getting embarrassed at home by Pat Hill in 2001? Wisconsin should have found a way to back out of this one, as Fresno is the WAC's top team and full of veterans.

- Before transferring to Wisco from Kansas State, Evridge started six games in 2005 for the Wildcats. The result? Under 50-percent passing, 6 TDs and 7 picks. That includes a 5-27 performance against Nebraska. Not much is asked of a Badger QB, but running will be mighty tough with 8 guys in the box.

- They lose both starting WRs Luke Swan and Paul Hubbard, which isn't a big deal in itself. Those guys should have been playing in the MAC and were hurt half the season. But unless Nick Toon plays like his father or another sophomore steps up big-time, this is one of the worst Big 10 receiving corps.

- Quality backup RB Lance Smith got the boot for a series of transgressions starting with stealing his girlfriend's shoes. Does anyone else picture him like Chris Elliott from There's Something About Mary?

- Ikegwuonu did have an outstanding 15 passes broken up and would have been among this year's elite CBs with Malcolm Jenkins and Vontae Davis. Instead, he made a terrible decision to go pro and was picked No. 141 after busting his knee at the Combine. Then again, this guy doesn't exactly have sound decision-making.

Realety:

Let's be clear: Wisconsin is not nearly in the same class as Ohio State. We're picking them No. 2 in the Big Ten because they're very experienced and have few major flaws. They got the nod over Illinois solely based on the fact their coach isn't Ron Zook.

That being said, Bo Schembechler would love the 2008 Badgers. It's going to be a lot smash-mouth football on both sides of the ball. The Badgers are going to run the ball down people's throat this year and don't be surprised if they pass 2,500 yards on the ground this year.

We can't get over the Fresno St. game. With at Michigan, Ohio St. and Penn St. on the other side of a bye, the Badgers first month-and-a-half is brutal. And for some odd reason their last game is against Cal Poly. Was Alvarez drunk again when he put this thing together?

The Badgers love Central Florida (four straight trips) and we see them headed back there for the holidays.

THE TRIUMPHANT RETURN OF WILLIE WILLIAMS

Update: Uh, whoops. Guess that was a little premature. As for the NCAA: How could you, you bastards?! Myles, we will never forgive you for this...

Oh what a glorious day! We've been like a brother to Willie Williams over the last couple, turbulent years.

Needless to say, when we opened up the New York Times today and saw a feature on 2W, we immediately howled "Anything's possibullllll!!!!!!!!" and woke our entire building.

As first reported by us, Willie is slummin' it this year at D-II Glenville State College after getting the boot from Louisville last year. But you'll be happy to know Willie spirit's are high, and that his sense of humor is still firmly intact with gems like these:

On going to Glenville: "Maybe Willie Williams needed a small town to stay focused."

On being free of distractions: "It’s just keeping me focused. There’s not a lot of distractions and everything so that makes it even better. The community and everything are helping hands. I told you, I be feeling like Rocky."

On seeing Glenville for the first time: "The road was just winding. It was like some real TV stuff to me. I was like, ‘Are you serious?’ When I saw everything, I was just like, ‘Willie, is that what you want to do?' "

OK, he's lost a little bit of his magic from high school but we're very relieved to see Willie still refers to himself in the third person.

As we always end these posts: Hang in there Big Willie Style!