6.06.2007

BRUCE BOWEN'S DIRRRTIEST HITS

After an extremely unpredictable 2007 Playoffs, the only thing guaranteed in this year's NBA Finals is that Bruce Bowen is going to try and castrate LeBron James. In honor of this Spur's grisly tactics, we have compiled a list of Bowen's Dirrtiest Hits.

Apologies to Amare Stoudemire for not making this list - we're sure you will be on it shortly.

Cue the Christina Aguilera music and enjoy...


5. Kicking Ray Allen in the back

Bowen has dealt out much more pain to Ray Allen but this is just comical how blatantly childish this is.

4. Stepping on Steve Francis

A staple of the Bruce Bowen defense, here he steps on Steve Francis' foot while he comes down from a jump shot. Bowen is so dirty he doesn't even realize when he is doing the other team a favor, such as in this case.

3. Undercutting Vince Carter

As if it isn't enough to try and take out Vinsanity's knees, Bowen has the audicity to give the Tim Duncan shit-eating-grin afterward while complaining to the refs. How does Vince not pop Bowen here???

2. Kneeing Steve Nash in the nuts

If it was anyone else in the league aside from Bowen or Chris Wilcox, you probably give them the benefit of the doubt on this one. But given Bruce Bowen's history, this is 100% intentional.

1. Kicking Wally World in the face

You don't think Wally was happy when he got shipped to the Eastern Conference? Nothing pisses off Bruce "Lee" more than a pretty boy with short, spikey hair - except for childhood obesity, of course.


At some point this series, a Cavalier is going to have to step up and do what no one else has been willing to do - take a swing at Bowen and police the game themselves since the referees won't.

Our nomination is Bad Boy wanna-be Drew Gooden and his ducktail...

35 comments:

Anonymous said...

I'd like to see Bowen dealt with off the court. He has no business wearing an NBA uniform.

Anonymous said...

Bowen is one of the best defenders in the NBA, he does what is needed to win. there are always ruff plays in every sport. brushing back a batter, a cut block, every sport has its nastiness, it is just the complaining that needs to stop.

Anonymous said...

yo, first try to play against one of the so-called best defenders and then review your opinion...

ArC said...

"there are always ruff plays in every sport."

Yes, the jump kick is a staple of great basketball defense.

indestructikool said...

There's a difference between playing "rough" and intentionally trying to injure people, which is what Bruce Bowen is doing when he sticks his feet under a descending shooter. You're supposed to allow a shooter the space to land; if you don't, it's a foul. But Bowen's actions in this regard are so blatant and dangerous that he should be ejected, suspended, and heavily fined (along with his team) every time he pulls this crap. It's one thing if you want to be a pesty, committed defender. It's an entirely different matter when you're trying to hurt people. These types of plays can end seasons or even careers, not to mention lead to fights. If the NBA really cares about its "image," the health of its players, and the integrity of the game, they should clamp down on Bruce Bowen.

Anonymous said...

youre an idiot. Your bias here shines through very clearly.

Anonymous said...

Oh please. All you people who complain about Bowen get real. Basketball is a tough sport, and he's one of the few who actually plays hard nosed in your face ball. Has everyone gone soft. He's a deadly 3 point shooter and an extreme annoyance to anyone he defends. The mere fact that some of you say he shouldn't even be on the court must not be true Basketball fans.

James said...

Bruce Bowen is just reckless, he's not dirty. Grow a dick, you whiners.

Anonymous said...

Bowen is so dirty, but he does have super powers.
In the split second that was available after his man jumps, he perfectly predicts where his man will land, and stick his foot right there to intentionally injure players. It really is brilliant!
Also, I am fully aware that nobody ever steps on other people's foot in basketball, unless of course, you are being defended by Bowen.

Anonymous said...

this so called evidence is pathetic. the only dirty thing on this whole list is the kick to ray allen, everything else is just normal competitive basketball.

if that is all bowen has done in 10 years, most of which he is playing around 100 games a season covering the best offensive player... i'd say he is totally innocous. and his foul, flagrant foul, and ejection statistics back me up. or are you really going to convince me the refs give undrafted bowen star calls over the likes of carter, allen, kobe, melo, tmac, dirk, etc?? get real people

Anonymous said...

If tripping people, kneeing people in the nuts, and kicking people in the face isn't "dirty" ... what on earth is? A "rough play" is a hard pick or a strong box out ... it's not busting out kung fu moves.

Anonymous said...

You're all morons. Quit your whining. Maybe one day your team will be as good as the Spurs. "till then I guess you'll just have to get off making shit up about their players.

Anonymous said...

Anybody notice in the first clip that before Bowen goes ballistic and kicks Allen that Ray Allen knocked Bowen down with a chin-high elbow? (the kind Kobe got suspended for) And that Allen got called for a foul on the play-- stupid retaliation by Bowen, sure, but the first cheap shot was by Allen. Also notice that in the Vinsanity clip, VC throws three wild elbows (one at Horry while cutting through the lane, two at Bowen, including a pop in the chin (with his shoulder, the elbow gets Bowen in the chest) that frees him up for the jumper in the first place. And notice it was Vince that got tossed. Yeah, those NBA refs always give the break to the thugs over the superstar scoring types when it comes to calls...Count me in the "quit whining" camp...

Anonymous said...

Hey this is crap. Here in the Philippines specially in the depressed areas. People play 5 on 5 with literally knives inside their shorts because if they lose, they will have no money to bring home. So kicking, tripping whatever is just lame because they do it all the time here. Just quit whining and play ball.

Anonymous said...

stop the complaining, because deep down, you know you want someone in your team doing the same......

Anonymous said...

Intenionally causing injury to Vince, Francis, and Wally might have made the NBA a better product.

Anonymous said...

I'm really curious, what was his excuse for the flying kick to Wally's face? You use an outstretched hand to contest a shot. I have never seen anything like that.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations to the Phoenix Suns, the true 2007 NBA Champs. You have to admit that no matter what team you're a fan of.

Anonymous said...

I will complain. Dirty, cheap shot, flopping, whining, bitching, bullshit has no place in basketball. And it's all the Spurs do. F-A-C-T

Anonymous said...

Sheesh, for all claims of being dirty, you could only find a few clips, none of them looking that intentional. He is definitely a chippy player, but I suspect you could find hundreds of cheap looking plays if you slowed down game film of guys like Shaq or Karl Malone.

Anonymous said...

I love seeing all the Spurs fans trying to justify "Blackjack Bowen" by saying what he does is just part of ball. Kicking Stoudamire's leg as he goes in for a layup? Purposely undercutting jump shooters (he's done it repeatedly)? A FLYING JUMP KICK TO WALLY'S FACE?! Yes, that's all part of ball, idiots, just like Kobe's magical flying elbow earlier this season was "just part of his shooting movement". Give me a break. Bowen is dirty. He intentionally tries to injure players to compensate for a lack of talent. He's a hard worker and a fierce competitor, I'll give you that, but he's turned to the Dark Side to find success.

All I can say is it's a shame that players like Duncan and Parker have to have their team blighted by Bowen's dirtiness and Manu's circus flopping.

The sad thing is I used to like the Spurs, even though most of the country considers them boring and dirty. After seeing them make it to the Finals the way they did, however, (flopping, whining, dirty-play, Cheap Shot Rob's hit on Nash) I'm fed up with them.

They don't deserve to be here.

themickel said...

Gotta love the NBA. The Suns get two key players suspended for a deciding playoff game for doing nothing more than walking away from the bench - yet Bowen gets nothing for intentionally trying to seriously injure opposing players on a continual basis.

Sorry Spurs. Even if you win the championship, you don't deserve it.

Anonymous said...

To the comments saying everyone who criticizes the Spurs' dirty/whiny play is jealous and wishes their team was that "good":

Sorry, but no. If my team played the way the Spurs do (i.e. Manu's flopping, Bowen's back-alley tactics) I would be utterly disgusted and stop buying season tickets. How can you claim to possess a shred of objectivity and not see that Bowen is a dirty player?

You can't. Any reasonable person sees this. Therefore your only defense is, "Sure, but a lot of players are dirty. Not just Bowen."

That's really the only logical argument you can make. The answer to which is: "True, but that doesn't make it sportsman-like. Isn't that what Barry Bonds decided with steroids?"

Anonymous said...

i can't lie, i like watching the spurs and i even like bruce, but he's an asshole. the vince and francis ones might've been accidental, buthe definitely went out to injure nash and his boot had no business being that high to catch szcerbiak in the face. i mean he's 6-8, even if he's crouching bruce ain't got no 50 in vertical. it was a blatant kick

Anonymous said...

you people are pathetic. stop whining. basketball is supposed to be a rough sport. the players arent complaing, so why should the fans.

dont get upset just cause the spurs are freakin awesome.

and when they are hot, NOBODY can beat them, and i mean no one.

their bench is better than half the teams out there.

Anonymous said...

"...the players arent complaing, so why should the fans..."

Right. Players never complain. Have you ever watched a Spurs game? Manu Ginobili could write a Lifetime movie about the horrible abuses to which he has been subjected.

You're right, no one can beat them. They played great in the finals against the Heat last year after they beat the Mavs and made no noise about the foul calls in that series. Good call, you hit it right on the button.

Anonymous said...

This is the type of play the NBA rewards. And it's awful.

At least the Bad Boys or the 90s Knicks would come right at you and throw down, not this cowardly garbage.

Anonymous said...

bruce bowen is a baby back bitch
end of story

Anonymous said...

All of you that support Bruce Bowen are a bunch of IGNORANT fools and are EVEN WORSE than him. How on earth can you feel that injuring other players is okay? All you guys know how to say is 'stop whining'. Acting like a 5 year old is really gonna make your argument stronger...

The Spurs are a great team, and he can is in fact a great defender. But bottom line is: he still IS cold and heartless and so are all of you that support him. He doesn't deserve an NBA Uniform.

Anonymous said...

Everyone has tactics, some memeber on some time, at one time or another, even yourselves at a local basketball court or gym, have done something unintenttionally, or out of frustration, or something else. Basketball is a game of circumstance, not a one man show/game. Everyone needs to quit their complaining and let the chips fall where they may. THe Spurs are as proffesional and disciplined as any basketball team should be. They have won 4 championships in the last 9 years, and considering they won there first in 1999, they are for real and they will be around for a long time. Bruce bowen is a great defender, and everybody knows it. The players and the fans. He gives you trouble, he guards the best you got, he will 4ever be remember for that TALENT. All you bitches out there that say the SPurs whine, complaing, play dirty,... I could find the same shit on your favorite players from your favorite teams. To sum this all up, say what you may, but the SPURS can't hear you from all way on top. BITCHES!!!

Anonymous said...

bruce is a douche. end of story. in his next life, he'll be reincarnated into a roll of toilet paper in the bathroom of some taco bell.

his ankle tripping, foot stepping, ball crushing knees, and undercutting are 10 times worse than anything ever done by the other dirty players in nba history. karl malone had his elbows, and at worst someone would walk away with a bloody nose. but at least they'd still be playing basketball the next day.

not only that, he gets away with so much bullshit, its not even funny...no, im not talking about the obvious ones...im talking about your normal everyday personal fouls like hacking, holding(jerseys), tripping, etc.

what? just cause the guy has no fucking skill set, the nba can market him as a defensive stopper?

...oh and by the way, you douchebags that keep telling everyone that he's a 3-point sharpshooter need to check your eyes. the only 3's that guy ever makes are at either corner. and thats the shortest 3-point shot. no skill. none. the guy smokes tweak before the game and just does what comes naturally...pure evil.

you bowen fucktard apologists can go jump off a high rise building and land your ass on a bike with no seat.

oh and can someone fucking tell me how the spurs and the detroit pistons got the label of being good defensive teams? they foul just as much, or even more, than most teams but dont get calls cause somehow they were magically labeled as defensively superior?

and to those who are soooo skeptical about nba conspiracies...well, if 1 referee can get caught for throwing/winning games for gambling, how many other things do you think could be happening behind the curtains? get your head out of the sand and open your eyes.

you think bud selig and the mlb had NO IDEA about steroids and peformance enhancing drugs? gimme a fucking break.

Anonymous said...

To James who said "grow a dick.."

Nobody says that Bruce Bowen shouldn't be on the court. He s a terrific player who doesn't have to resort to unmanly and shitty tactics that he use to win a game. We'll let our dicks grow mate..U get Bowen's dick out of your ass!! Only if you want to that is..

Anonymous said...

"their bench is better than half the teams out there" oh yeah i would love if my team had a bench of jacque vaughn and matt bonner ian mahinmi DerMarr Johnson ha the only goo d bench player they have is ginobili, michael finley sucks most of the time and he's old. I would love to have the spurs bench

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