2009 REALEST OF THE YEAR

It's that time of year again - when we select the most ridiculous, idiotic, narcissistic and just downright absurd individual of the last 365 days - a.k.a. the 5th annual Realest of the Year.

They've got some pretty select company to join:

2008: Starbury
2007: Akon
2006: The Realests
2005: Arizona Bum

You might be wondering why we are making our selection so early. After all, there's still five days left for people to lose their minds. Well we've still got to select the Realest of the Decade, people. Feel free to send in your submissions, which will have absolutely no bearing on the results.

But now we'd like to give a shout-out to the runners-up for this year's R.O.Y.:

Dre Bly:

What's realer that busting out a vintage Neion Deion Sanders dance? Doing it at your own 25-yard line:



Stephon Marbury:

Starbury made a huge push for back-to-back titles with his new YouTube channel. But then again, who hasn't cried in front of their computer naked with R. Kelly in the background and then followed it by eating vaseline for desert?



Berlino:

Mascots are all fun and games until someone gives a piggyback ride and slams into the hurdles truck. Seriously, who hired this hit man?



Berian Gobeil:

We never thought we'd see Stonybrook soccer on this list, but then again we never thought we'd see soccer players doing cartwheels as trash talk. After Hartford goalie Nenad Cudic did cart wheels to psyche out Gobeil on penalty kicks, the Stonybrook player scored and then returned the favor by doing cart wheels in his face:



And the winner is..........

Elizabeth Lambert:

You've all seen the pony tail yank, but that was just the highlight of the Lambert Massacre vs. BYU, when she also punched a player in the back, another in the face, and just went flat-out Beast Mode for 90 minutes. Get this girl on the Real World/Road Rules Challenge immediately:

REALEST OF THE WEEK

Meredith of Queens, who asks new New York Post sex columnist Ashley Dupre:

"How do I know if my daughter may be getting into trouble?"

Woah, Ms. Lippy, did you seriously just ask a whore advice on your daughter?

Bravo.

REALEST OF THE WEEK

Kudos to former Notre Dame coach Charlie Weis for taking the low road on his way out of South Bend with bozacks in hand.

First Weis accused USC coach Pete Carroll of cheating on his wife by living with an SC grad student in Malibu.

When a national backlash ensued, Weis didn't deny the comment but instead went to the classic "taken out of context" excuse. Um, what exactly was taken out of context about this?

"Let me ask you this question: You guys know about things that go on in different places. Was I living with a grad student in Malibu, or was I living with my wife in my house? You could bet that if I were living with a grad student here in South Bend, it would be national news. He's doing it in Malibu, and it's not national news."