Real Defined

Byron Leftwich's web page he made for a class at Marshall:

http://webpages.marshall.edu/~leftwich1/

Amazingly, it isn't Jay but actually M-Eezy, that described Leftwich best:

"Yo, I'm young Memphis, used to play the apprentice
Now I'm like the teacher, c'mere, let me teach ya"

Realest of the Week

From Newsday:

A city school teacher was arrested after he took his toddler with him on a would-be tryst in Greenwich Village with what he thought was a 13-year-old girl, police said yesterday.

The Wednesday arrest of Alan Schaefer, 43, was most unusual, police said, because most men who meet underage girls try to be as discreet as possible.

But Schaefer showed up with his 14-month-old son, even though he and the girl - a young-looking vice detective dressed as a teenager - he met on the Internet had already agreed they would have sex at her place, police said.

Holding his son in one arm, Schaeffer took the undercover officer's hand with his other hand and strolled down the street toward her "apartment," police said. Instead, back-up police moved in and Schaefer was arrested. His son was placed with family.

When school starts in September, Schaefer, who has tenure, will be assigned to an administrative post, away from children, pending the outcome of the investigation, the department said.



Jay and this guy both know what it's like to be guilty until proven innocent - except this guy is really broke:

"Happy when they heard he was arraigned, glad he's indicted
Got big money, big lawyers to fight it
Just like Cochran, cocksuckers you never see me boxed in
Y'all all knnow it, Jigga's a fighter
Plus I'm chlostrophobic, back on the streets before you know it"

Realest of the Week

Lawrence Phillips - hands down (and I'm a little mad this story got so big because I had it picked out of a USA Today blurb four days ago).

Everyone knew LP was a horrible person, but a former national champion playing 15-year olds in a pickup game of football? It's like a McDonald's ad on crack.

From the AP:

Los Angeles - Former NFL running back Lawrence Phillips was charged Tuesday with multiple counts of assault with a deadly weapon, two days after prosecutors say he drove into three teenagers who argued with him following a pickup football game.

He was charged with seven counts of assault with a deadly weapon, two counts of child abuse and one count of hit and run. Phillips, 30, a star at Nebraska before the St. Louis Rams made him the sixth overall pick in the 1996 NFL draft, got into an argument with several young men after the pickup football game Sunday in LA.

He left the park, but returned and drove a black Honda onto the field, allegedly running into a group of young males. Three were hit, including two aged 14 and 15.
The car Phillips was driving had been reported stolen in San Diego earlier in the week.


Jay sums up LP's feelings for us: "I was doin' this shit when you was shittin' pampers" 

Realest of the Week

HBO Sports.

Although this piece was done 10 years ago, they do a great feature on Tommie Smith and John Carlos... and brought the bozacks on Brent Musburger. HBO went out of their way to mention a Musburger column after the Olympics, in which he said Smith and Carlos looked like nothing more than "black-skinned storm troopers".

Why does HBO only have the balls to mention this? With every graphic that says "Brent Musburger - CBS Sports" there should be fine print below that says "Called Tommie Smith and John Carlos black-skinned storm troopers". End of discussion.

Making it even worse, the exclusive interview Musburger got with them at the Games started his rapid ascension up the ranks and into the booth.



With the approval of Jay and his mom, I dipped into the "Superugly" lyrics just this once: "I came in ya Bentley backseat/Skeeted in Jeep/Left condoms in tha baby seat/Here n****/Tha gloves is off/The love is done/Its whateva, wheneva, howeva/N*** One" 




"Y'all n**** would never finish that y'all be starting/Never could back up that shit y'all be talking/I make you famous/I put your face on milk cartons"

Note about last quote: We are starting to wonder how Jay's quotes always work so perfectly.... Were these bars about the Smith/Carlos beef with Musburger? Or were they about a future Jay-Z inspired blog that reports on such things? We are going to play each album over our blog (like you can do with Pink Floyd's "Dark Side of the Moon" on the Wizard of Oz).

Unfortunately, test results won't come back from the lab for awhile...

Real Honorable Mention Quote

I almost forget... I think Jay said it best:

"I got the, mind capacity of a young Butch Cassidy/N***** get fly, let em defy gravity/Fo'-five rapidly lift your chest cavity"

Real Honorable Mention

New York Yankee fans (and the kid, only for his final words before the jump).

A thrill-seeking teenager hoping to make ESPN highlights plunged over 50 feet from the upper deck seats into the netting behind home plate last night in the eighth inning of the Yankees' 2-1 loss to the White Sox, landing in front of a stunned Yankee Stadium crowd of 53,946.

"His exact words, were, 'Bro, I don't know, bro,' " his friend, Spadafino said.
As Derek Jeter laid down a bunt in the eighth, Harper plunged, feet-first, onto the backstop to the amazement of everyone in the Stadium. He had planned his leap for several minutes, according to witnesses, and caught the ire of the paying customers seated behind him who could not see the late-game action.

"Every single person sitting there was saying either sit down or jump off," Tripi said after the three friends were questioned by NYPD officers.
"He always makes a scene," Tripi said after Harper was carted off in an ambulance at 10:34 p.m. and carted off to Lincoln Medical Center.

Realest of the Week

Mike Tyson (who knew?).

From the Times of India (that's right, the Times of India):

"Mike Tyson is reportedly set to star in a porn film - with Jenna Jameson. The former boxing World Heavyweight Champion claims he is desperate for cash, after being hit with a tax bill for several million dollars, and a porn career is a tempting offer.

Said Tyson: "I need the money up front."

Boxing journalist Pedro Fernandez: "According to court documentation from Tyson's rape trial, his member is at least 14 inches long.

"If Tyson brings out some of the ferocity that made him a champion, he could definitely become a successful porn star."



I believe it was Jay-Z that said it best: "Give him money to eat, then next week he's broke/Cause when you sleep, he's reachin for your throat/Word on the street, you reap what you sew/Not out of fear but love, love for the game/Roc family first, we never change man."



Quick Poll: Who do you think has taken more shots to the face lately: Tyson or Jameson? 

Realest of the Week

Former New Orleans Saints Safety Gene Atkins.

From thephatphree.com:

"Arrested for firebombing (In April 1998, Alfred Simmons, his wife and two daughters escaped injury when a Molotov cocktail was tossed through a window at their home) a former business associate but was later acquitted. Most recently he barricaded himself in his house after his wife called police claiming he had shoved her against a wall, choked her, bit her and then beat her with a remote control. Then, when told by police that he was under arrest, Atkins replied, “No I’m not” and punched the officer in the throat, then pushed him outside the home. Surprisingly the police didn't agree, re-entered the home, found Atkins holding four knives, and summarily dropped him with a 'hot shot' from a Taser gun."


As Jay would say... "Too sexy for jail like I'm Right Said Fred - I'm not guilty, now GIMME back my bread."