4.22.2008

REALESTS' MOCK DRAFT 12.1

We seem to have struck a chord with our 12.0 mock draft for fans out there tired of getting beaten over the head by draft pundits and their mocks.

Back by popular demand, we present Part II of our 3-part series to find out who's really going where this Saturday:

(Editor's Note: Part III will drop on Friday.)




11. Buffalo: QB Bret Meyer (Iowa State)
Reminds Us of a Young:
Kordell Stewart
Skinny: We love this pick. After failing on the likes of Alex Van Pelt, Rob Johnson, Drew Bledsoe and J.P. Losman, the Bills finally get it right (you didn't really think Trent Edwards was the answer, did you? You did???) He's a Vince Young clone: Don't look at his abysmal statistics, just look at his team's record with him as a starter. Er, don't look at that either. Whatever. He had 3 times as many wins as Trent Edwards during his senior year. And for any doubters still out there, this is all we have to say: Fire up the K-Gun again, folks!

12. Denver: K Troy Van Blarcom (Kansas Wesleyan)
Reminds Us of a Young: Jeff Reed
Skinny: The Donkeys are suddenly in need of replacing one of the greatest clutch kickers in NFL history after Jason Elam bolted for Atlanta. If you're going to take a flyer on Maurice Clarett, you might as well roll the dice on this guy. Bailing on USC to head to Kansas Wesleyan, TVB made 9 of 14 FG attempts last season before deciding to leave early because "School just wasn't for me." Yep, he's a real winner.

13. Carolina: TE Louis Irizarry (Youngstown State)
Reminds Us of a Young: Jeremy Shockey
Skinny: Why are we the only ones who see the Panthers are a Wesley Walls-type player away from another Super Bowl? Compared to Tony Gonzalez coming out of high school, Irizarry got the boot from OSU for pounding everyone from random students to his girlfriend - Louie event spent six months in the slammer. Mind-boggling senior year at YSU (25 catches, 2 TD) makes him worth the gamble. Tremendous upside.

14. Chicago: QB Blake Mitchell
(South Carolina)

Reminds Us of a Young:
Brad Johnson
Skinny: We can just picture GM Jerry Angelo reading the scouting report: Party animal and head case that expects to get pulled every time he makes a mistake. "Sold!!!!" In 2 years, Mitchell went from Spurrier's next protege to a forgotten man. But who needs the combine to skyrocket your draft stock when you've got those dance moves? Good luck sacking this guy. And just imagine the parties with him, Orton and Grossman...

15. Detroit: WR James Banks (Carson-Newman)
Reminds Us of a Young: Charles Rogers
Skinny: It's so easy to ridicule the Lions it almost takes the fun out of it (key word: almost). With holes everywhere else on the team, Matt Millen goes back to the well again for another wide receiver with "questionable character." Like C Rog, Banks can't put down the herb. Also got to love the maturity factor since he's already 20-freakin'-4. Jon Kitna will have his hands full converting this guy.

16. Arizona: DT Frank Okam (Texas)
Reminds Us of a Young: Gilbert Brown
Skinny: What's with the Cards and overweight slacker D-lineman? Well, if they liked Gabe Watson and Alan Branch, they're going to love Frank Okam. Let's hope ESPN has a crew at the Sizzler to get the shocked expression on this 350-pound behemoth's face when he gets picked here.


17. Minnesota: WR Adarius Bowman (Oklahoma State)
Reminds Us of a Young: Chad Johnson
Skinny: The Vikings desperately need offensive weapons since the Troy Williamson and Tarvaris Jackson picks blew up in their face worse than a Dan Kendra science experiment. Solution? A physical, big play-receiver once projected to go in the top 10 whose stock has plummeted after getting busted for weed (sixth round? You can't be serious). Eerily familiar? Yeah, sounds like the next Randy Moss to us too.

18. Houston: RB Hershel Denis (USC)
Reminds Us of a Young:
Herschel Walker
Skinny: The Texans finally reveal their master plan for passing on Reggie Bush two years ago by selecting Denis, the guy that was supposed to start in front of Bush and LenDale White at USC before blowing out his knee 13 times. He turned heads by rushing for 30 yards vs. Illinois in the Rose Bowl and looks to finally be fully recovered from all those surgeries. This 6-year senior's ceiling is sky-high.

19. Philadelphia: WR Joe Cowan (UCLA)
Reminds Us of a Young:
Vince Papali
Skinny: Donovan McNabb, your dreams have been answered. How many times have we heard announcers bitch about Philly receivers dropping balls? Enter surehanded Joe Cowan who caught 29 balls last year. Just look at that mustache. Combined with Curtis ("Killer C's", anyone?) and trading next year's first round pick for Matt Jones, the Eagles immediately become Super Bowl contenders with this all-white combo.

20. Tampa Bay: S Corey Lynch (Appalachian State)
Reminds Us of a Young:
John Lynch
Skinny: Call John Lynch overrated if you want to, but after cutting him in 2004 the Bucs defense has nose-dived. Made famous by his game-winning FG block against Michigan, Lynch II (who also wears #47) can't even outrun the Michigan kicker (below). Who gives a shit? This guy defines high motor.



Check us out at the HailRedskins.com Mock Draft Database.

2 comments:

Tom Campion said...

That's Jason Gingell, not KC Lopata.

Anonymous said...

Lynch is the next big safety of the league and i hope he goes to tampa cuz then i don't have to buy a new jersey I already have John Lynch's old Buc's jersey, and I played high school ball with Corey. he is legit!