5.16.2008

BRIAN ELLERBE FOUND!

Dear Readers: You guys deserve Realest of the Week honors.

Of course, that's not going to happen; we're still holding out hope an athlete will do something incredibly stupid in the next three days.

But for every pop quiz we throw your way, you have answers. You tip us off when needed. And most importantly, you've just tracked down Brian Hersholt Ellerbe.

We gave you three months to find him; "RB" tracked him down in a week.

Behold:

Brian H. Ellerbe
VP of Corporate Development
Madison Grace Construction Services LLC.


Right off the top, what is with fired Michigan coaches ending up in land development? First Jim Boccher, now Brian Ellerbe. When Bill Martin fires each coach, does he hand them all a card and say "It's a guy I know in the biz. Give him a call - he's good people."?

Second, does anyone else picture Ellerbe with the same job as Fred Flintstone, working on the back of a dinosaur in a bedrock? OK, it's just us.

Third, Ellerbe's list of talents and job duties is especially laughable. They don't make any damn sense, and the first one is a flat-out lie:

• Charismatic leader and mentor
• Client and corporate development
• Community development and outreach
• Public, private and political cultivation/relations
• Human resource enhancement

Even George O'Leary has to cringe reading the first bullet.

Let's hope the slow economy doesn't hit Madison Grace too hard, because we can really picture this happening after looking over his job description:



Oh yeah, and now that we've found him, a pair of Pumps to the first reader to get a cell picture with him for the interwebs while in Vegas this summer.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Glad to see you've found Brian, and glad to see that he's doing well. Too bad you couldn't include a few kind words mixed in with your vitriol.

Anonymous said...

Hey, why are people so sensitive? Does everyone need to be carrying around a bouquet of roses to give to everyone? Highly doubtful Brian Ellerbe will be affected by this or even read it. Sheesh. Panzie.

Anonymous said...

He lives! Great detective work. (And to the first guy, I suggest you either lighten up or watch a tape of that 50-point loss to MSU to remember who we're talking about here.)

Anonymous said...

Mr. Ellerbe will be back in the fold very, very soon.
And it is not that anyone is a panzy, it is that your blog is not funny. And in 3 years, he will be a head coach. Research is just not about clicking away on the internet. Good luck my friend.

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