5.09.2008

REALEST OF THE WEEK

Lost in all the hubbub about Barry Zito being the worst free-agent signing ever is Seattle "slugger" Richie Sexson.

Making a cool mil more than Zito this year ($15.5M to $14.5M), Sexson is another pickup that set back a franchise 10 years - he's barely batted over the Mendoza Line the last two years.

Well it all came to a head last night after some high cheese from Kason Gabbard. Channeling his inner Manny Ramirez, Sexson not only charged the mound for zero reason, he also had the balls to chuck his helmet at a pitcher that's 5 inches shorter and 40 pounds lighter:



Obviously the color guy also gets an Honorable Mention for calling Sexson "a .200-hitting, formerly good player." Where was he schooled, The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can't Read Good And Wanna Learn To Do Other Stuff Good Too?

You're probably at home wondering to yourself, "Shouldn't he be the Fakest of the Week?"

That would be a mistake, friends.

Remember Rule #1 about The Realests: We embrace everything that is wrong in sports. And Rule #2, always blame someone else for your problems. So in this case, we'll look the other way about Sexson being a bitch.

Kudos Richie.

2 comments:

bt said...

Andruw Jones and Adrian Beltre (until this year) have to be given consideration for worst FA signing as well.

Druw would kill for a mendoza avg.

Ken said...

Zito is in the front end of his contract though...not getting any better down in San Fran