THE 'M'ISERABLE 10

With the end finally in sight, it’s time to face the facts: This season in Michigan sports made us want to claw our faces off. So we decided to re-live it all by counting down the 10 most irritating and pathetic moments in Wolverine athletics. And trust us, it was a real challenge to limit this to ten moments.

With no disrespect to other lackluster seasons (women’s basketball, hockey), football and men’s basketball competed at a level other Michigan sports couldn’t touch. Without further adieu:

10. AIR GEORGIA

Sport: Basketball
Date: March 30th
Opponent: South Carolina (NIT Finals)
Skinny: While getting spanked by South Carolina in the 2nd half of the NIT Finals, Brent Petway decided to show us some of that hot shit he displayed a game earlier against Old Dominion. Instead of reappearing on Sportscenter’s “Top 10”, Petway loses his grip and completely airballs the dunk.
Result: Lost, 76-64

9. TAKIN’ A DUMP
Sport: Football
Date: September 10th
Opponent: Notre Dame
Skinny: Down 7 with less than a minute remaining, it’s 4th and 15 from our own 37 yard line. Instead of tossing it deep, Chad Henne decides to dump the ball off to Tyler Ecker for the (insert random number) time of the game. Oh, and the pass was incomplete (note that end-of-game situations are a theme in this countdown…)
Result: Lost, 17-10

8. UGLY, TY
Sport: Football
Date: November 19th
Opponent: Ohio State
Skinny: With Michigan trailing by four, Tyler Ecker catches the ball near midfield with just seconds remaining on the clock. Instead of getting out of bounds for one last play, Ecker turns it upfield in an attempt to take it to the house through the entire Ohio State secondary. Time runs out after he is tackled and Michigan losses to OSU for the 4th time in 5 years.
Result: Lost, 25-21

7. “...OFF THE MICHIGAN SCOREBOARD...”
Sport: Basketball
Date: March 4th
Opponent: Indiana
Skinny: Trailing by 3, Graham Brown appears to try and re-enact the Jordan-Bird McDonald's ads by chucking the ball off the Crisler scoreboard, resulting Michigan’s 24th turnover of the day. Not exactly Grant Hill to Christian Laettner…
Result: Lost, 69-67

6. ASS-TROTURF
Sport: Football
Date: September 24th
Opponent: Wisconsin
Skinny: Rolling out on the final play against Wisconsin for a Hail Mary, Chad Henne slips on the wet Field Turf and ends the game ceremoniously by falling on his ass.
Result: Lost, 23-20

5. STRIPTEASE

Sport: Basketball
Date: March 9th
Opponent: Minnesota
Skinny: After Michigan just turned the ball over twice for easy lay-ups, Dion Harris allows the ball to literally get ripped out of his hands for an easy transition basket. At this point, the whole team seems to say, “Fuck it”, and the Wolverines miss out on the NCAA Tournament for the 8th straight year.
Result: Lost, 59-55

4. ‘D’-SASTER
Sport: Basketball
Date: March 4th
Opponent: Indiana
Skinny: With under a minute left and the game tied, Dion Harris inexplicably fouls Earl Calloway in the backcourt after a Michigan miss. Calloway hits one of the free throws to put Indiana ahead for good.
Result: Lost, 69-67

3. TOUCH!!!… BACK?!?!

Sport: Football
Date: September 10th
Opponent: Notre Dame
Skinny: Down two touchdowns with under six minutes left, Michigan is 1st and Goal from the 1-yard line. Instead of just getting stuffed on a simple quarterback sneak, Chad Henne loses possession and 20 yards of field position in a split second by fumbling the ball into the end zone. Big Blue nation utters the first "Only fuckin' Michigan" of the young season.
Result: Lost, 17-10

2. THE JUG-ULAR

Sport: Football
Date: October 8th
Opponent: Minnesota
Skinny: With their starting quarterback (Bryan Cupito) out with an injury and facing 3rd and 10 from their own 26 yard line, Minnesota decides to play for overtime with 1:30 remaining in the game. Gary Russell heads to the right side, waits for Michigan’s players to fall over themselves, and takes off for a 61-yard run to the Michigan 13 yard line. Minnesota ends up kicking a field goal to win it.
Result: Lost, 23-20

1. REMEMBER THE ALAMO!

Sport: Football
Date: December 28th
Opponent: Nebraska
Skinny: Some people say it was almost one of the greatest plays in college football history. We call it a fitting ending to a disastrous season, looking like ass clowns and not being able to beat a team that stopped playing altogether.
Result: Lost, 32-28